The war is on, the enemy has been engaged in mortal combat.
The foe is the mighty Northwest slug, or gastropod mollusc.
The weapons of mass destruction are Hamms, Michelob, and Widmer beers.
The battlefield is my vegetable garden.
The reason to make war, the fallen civilians.
And don't forget the bean counter, who keeps it all going with his stats.
Before the war is through one beer shall emerge the champion slug killer.
The Case Against Earthworms by Thomas Christopher
10 hours ago